Sometimes you can be the best partner in the world, and they still leave. Sometimes it's not you that caused them to leave; it's who they are. If you know you’ve done everything you could for the relationship and you know you were good to them then let them go as in that case it's you, its just who they are. And you can’t change who they are. People are going to say and do what they want even when they know they have done you wrong and your hurting from the breakup. So don’t live in the past thinking about all the time and energy you put into the relationship. You can’t get the past back after you invest in the relationship.  

Everyone talks about putting love back into yourself after a breakup but how?

I been through plenty of breakups. Honestly, after a breakup I learned you put love back into yourself by being there for yourself, being your best friend, speaking to yourself like you would to a friend, and making positive changes for me it was small things like drinking water every morning and cutting back on soda then it was big steps getting a better paying job and finally financing myself a decent car rather than driving a piece of junker lol.

If your ex insists you stay friends with them, take it as an insult.

If your ex insists you stay friends with them, take it as an insult.

Yep, usually when an ex breaks my heart and says that crap,"We can be friends" is usually their way of sounding like the nice guy so they don't feel bad for hurting me. The second a guy becomes my ex I go into no contact and focus on my healing. The second a guy becomes my ex I go into no contact and focus on my healing. I only stay friends with my ex if we share a child. Other than that I see no reason to be friends with an ex not even as a friends with benefits.

When your ex breaks no contact, the top four things to remember.

When your ex breaks no contact after days, weeks, months, and sometimes years you have to be very careful especially if they hurt you badly. So here are some things to look out for when your ex decides to reach out.

Don’t assume it’s just because they’re texting you, it’s with pure intentions. Most of the time exes will reach out for something to gain. There are either lonely, bored, wanting just sex, or they realized the grass isn’t greener on the other side.

They feel bad about the breakup. Most people feel gault after a breakup so to feel better they text you and apologize but don’t be fooled. 99% they are apologizing so they can stop feeling bad about hurting you.

Sometimes they text you so they can get you off their minds.

Other times they text you to see if they still have control over you and your heart, so they messaged you to see if you were waiting on them. Don’t fall for it.

Good luck and don’t be their fool.

When you don’t accept a breakup.

When you don’t accept a breakup.

In my youth I was always in a relationship going through plenty of breakups. What I’ve learned is when you don’t accept the breakup, you’re only stalling your healing. I’ve learned that when I didn’t accept the breakup that I was missing out on life. I was too busy hurting and wanting things to go back to the way they were before the breakup. It just didn’t feel real. Why would someone want to break up with me when I have been nothing but kind and loving to them? All these why the breakup question lived in my head 24/7. It made me think the breakup was an accident. All this did was make my healing longer and made my hurt worse. This is why you should accept a breakup. Don’t hold onto hope or obsess trying to make the breakup look like a mistake. Just accept it and focus on your healing. Life too short to walk around not accepting a breakup. No matter how much it hurts to accept the breakup it’s the only thing to do so you can free yourself so you can heal and become a stronger person. Don’t be afraid to accept a breakup. It doesn’t make you less of a person. It shows you’re mature enough to accept what isn’t meant to be.

This is what happens when you let your whole world revolve around your boyfriend/girlfriend.

This is what happens when you let your whole world revolve around your boyfriend/girlfriend.

You lose your friends. Your friends realize that you don’t value their time, so they stop coming around as they think you too busy with your partner.

Your partner has full control of the relationship including your emotions. For example, when they don’t want to make time for you it makes you crazy.

You never really get the chance to see who you truly are because you are too busy focused on the relationship.

You sit around waiting for that call or txt from your partner rather than living life.

You lose track of your health physically and mentally because you’re to worried about the relationship and want to focus on it.

Social gatherings don’t mean anything if your partner is not with you.

Your partner will feel like you’re to much for the relationship.Take it from me as in my youth this was how I was until I got hurt to the point of not caring about relationships anymore. So please don’t let your whole world revolve around relationships. Just focus on yourself.

Don’t let your whole world revolve around relationships. Take it from me as I was that girl. All my youth all I cared about was stupid relationships. If I wasn’t in a relationship, I wouldn’t be happy. I had to be in one. I had to be some guy's girl pleasing him in any way I could. I literally abandoned my friends, my family, and my potential future for a guy. I did whatever the guy wanted just to keep him because I was afraid of being alone and what people would think if I wasn’t in a relationship. Then after years of being in and out of relationships and being used and hurt here I am at 40 years old with no relationship finally learning that there is more to life than relationships. I’m also learning more about myself and my potential. I’m coming out of my shell. No more sitting Infront of my computer or phone hoping some guy will text me wanting to take me out. It feels great letting go of relationships and just focusing on myself and my growth.