It’s so nice being at the gym on the treadmill listening to self improvement videos while getting my workout in. It’s better than my music. I love learning new ways to improve myself since all my life I pretty much chased guys and never really focused on me.
I think the biggest thing right now is learning how to be in control of my emotions rather than making me act out or give up on something. Sometimes my emotions have me feeling bored or not productive and I don’t wanna work on things so it’s nice to acknowledge them. Take a breather and do it anyways. It feels great.
I’m starting to realize that I took relationships way too seriously in my youth. I’m also seeing that people don’t take relationship seriously. People spend time with you when they want to not when you want to. I can’t believe how much I’ve given up for a guy. I literally don’t need anything for a guy just for the guy to leave. I always thought I was real good to the guy knew anything he wanted he’d stay but in reality that’s not true. Now here I am at 40 and have nothing to show for it but scars from being hurt and used
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